THE WALRUS

No, I’m not going to tell you how to get one. If you’re like me, you get bombarded with SPAM telling you how. The fact, of course, is that none of these miraculous products actually work. The sales line that the bigger your dick the more satisfaction your partner will get is also not necessarily true. What women want is not length but strength - the strength of the erection, that is. In other words, the firmer the better. When the guy has a really firm erection, it conforms much better to the shape of the vaginal passage (so that it actually ends up looking like a boomerang). Further, anything up to a few more inches can be added to its normal length from the root of the penis, so that a 6 inch penis can in fact end up as much as 9 inches.

Spellcheck in Microsoft Word is a great invention. It does even cater pretty well for the variations in spelling between US English, British English and Australian English. However, many writers think all the have to do is spellcheck and all will be fine, neglecting to check for the ‘or’ that should be ‘of’, and so on. It also doesn’t distinugish between ‘everyday occurrences’ and ‘things you do every day‘. On the other hand, the grammar tool is nearly absolutely useless (the only thing I use it for is to pick up the occsional inadvertent extra space between words) and often just plain wrong.